a year goes by

last night we had some friends over for dinner. we were saying goodbye on the porch when i noticed the spattering of color on the front lawn. a few rose heads, some leaves, a couple hydrangea flowers, a couple phlox. then i realized my entire hydrangea bush had been deflowered. my friend remembered noticing the blooming bush when they arrived. so, while we were dining, someone came by and clipped off all the flowers.
then i remembered the exact thing happened last year.
seriously?? who thinks that is okay?!
I'll admit, i cut lilacs from bushes that are not my own, but i choose ones that belong to apartment buildings, not homes. or ones that are clearly neglected. and i certainly don't strip an entire bush!
wow.
it could have been worse. much worse. it doesn't compare to the home invasion, which we can now say was a year ago.
there has been much healing. my mind has nearly erased those crazy worst-case-scenario recordings that would play over and over in my thoughts. i can sleep deeply again. i can watch a movie without hearing things. i don't clench my elbow when i go down the hallway. when we do hear noises, we are still compelled to check things out, but i don't hold my phone with 911 already dialed - not every time.
we are grateful.
we think about Brian often and wonder how he is doing. we have hope that he has received the help that was offered to him at the hearing, and has moved towards healing as well.